A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, a customer could go into a store and buy something. Now if this something that this particular consumer bought just happened to be too big, too small, or just plain too defective, then this customer could go right on back to the store and receive either his money back or a replacement piece of merchandise to soothe him in his time of trouble. Then computers were invented, and nothing has ever been the same since. I don't care what side of the FORCE a person is on; if he or she has a computer and is dealing with a mail order company, then look out! There's gonna be trouble right here in computer city. The story that you are about to read is true; only the names of the computer mail order houses have been changed in order to protect the guilty.
COMPANY "A"
In the summer of 1993, I decided to upgrade my Amiga 3000 to a 68040 processor. Using Imagine to do complex rendering that took weeks to finish was just too much for me--especially when thunderstorms cropped up and killed the electricity. At the time, there was a big blowout sale on the then Progressive 040 card. The company promoting this big sale was a mail order company which we shall call Company "A." I eagerly counted my pennies, and when that fateful day arrived when I finally had enough money to buy the upgraded processor, I called Company "A." I was placed in an automated holding system, with a very, very redundant recording of this mail order outfit praising itself by listing the endless number of products that it sold for the Amiga computer. Fifteen minutes ticked by; then 20; then 30, 40, 50, and finally 60 minutes. A clerk finally answered the phone. At this point I was bristling with excitement, once I had cleared the sleep from my eyes, and was ready to place my order. However, there was no such luck. The clerk told me that Company "A" was moving to a different location, and that no one was on duty to take my order. She then apologized to me; apparently, someone had forgotten to turn off the recording asking me to hold.
The next week, I decided to try again. This time, my order went through! When I finally received my '040 card, I raced over to a friend's house, and we proceeded to install the software needed to run the new processor. But wait just a minute ladies and gentlemen--the disk was faulty. That's right! Every attempt at a disk salvage failed. Of course, this whole thing happened on a Saturday when there was no tech support available.
So, when the work week rolled around again, I made a call to Company "A." They promised me a replacement copy of the disk, and so I waited. And I waited. And I waited. And I...well, I think my point is clear. I called the company again, and they promised me another disk. This time, I received it. I quickly installed the software, and then a friend and I installed the Progressive 040 card. For about 12 hours, a 25 MHz 68040 proved to be quite an enhancement over my 16 MHz 68030/68881. But, after 12 hours, the machine began to crash at about 20 minute intervals. Needless to say, I was somewhat disappointed. But this was not the worst of it. For when I removed the card, the machine went dead. That's right; it had absolutely no life at all.
When I took the machine to my local Amiga dealer, a short 182 mile drive, the technician had absolutely no idea what the problem was, and so he ordered a factory refurbished replacement motherboard from Commodore. I waited and waited and waited and waited. I even had to call Company "A" to get an extension on their exclusive money back guarantee, and while I was at it, I told them the situation. When the motherboard finally arrived from Commodore, the extension on the money back guarantee had run out. By this time, I was out $500 for the 040 card and over $600 in computer repairs. What did I end up with for all my troubles? A 16 Mhz 68030/68881 Amiga 3000. Refusing to return my money, Company "A" agreed to trade the value of the Progressive 040 and apply it toward a Progressive Mercury 35 Mhz 68040 card. Not seeing any other choice, I went for the deal. But before setting sail on the already polluted waters of this little transaction, I asked if I would be allowed to have my money returned if this replacement accelerator didn't work. The answer appeared to be "yes."
So, I was on my way to better processing power, shorter rendering times, and higher RAM capacities, right? When I put the card in the Amiga 3000, the whole setup acted even stranger than the first time. I promptly removed the Mercury card, and then tried the machine again.
At this point in time, one might begin to ask just how this whole situation could get any worse. When the machine was booted cold, and I mean after sitting out for several hours with the power off, it would work for about 15 minutes; then, it would crash inexplicably for the next 15 minutes. After this 30 minute envelope had expired, the machine appeared to work normally. The technician at the Amiga dealer told me that it was probably a hardware problem. It looked as if the second 68040 card had crippled my machine again! But remember, I could get my money back. Perhaps not: for when I requested my money back, Company "A" told me "no." I finally worked out a deal to refund my original $500 for the first card, and apply what was left to a Spectrum EGS card. But I was still out $600 in computer repairs, not to mention the fact that my computer was wounded and living on borrowed time. For later that year, my A3000 went into an uncontrollable crash cycle, and when I finally booted up again, my second hard drive did not show up on the screen. Some investigative work revealed that the second drive was fine; my SCSI chip could only recognize one hard drive at a time, however. If I ever want to retrieve data from this second drive, I need to take the computer apart and disconnect the first hard drive.
At this time, the summer was almost gone, and I realized that I was going no where slow. So, I decided to save up for an Amiga 4000.
COMPANY "B"
It took me a whole year, but I finally saved up the cash for an Amiga 4000 system. At this time, the summer of 1994, the price war on A4000 systems was particularly heated. The company from which I decided to purchase my A4000 I shall call Company "B." I decided to go "all out" and buy a system with a Warp Engine 68040 accelerator card running at 40 Mhz with a total of 14 mb of RAM. Company "B" quoted me a price on the phone for the system I was interested in, and so I sent in the money. I received a phone call later telling me that I was $107 short of the amount the system would cost. I should have backed out right here, but instead I sent in the $107 and waited.
When I received my system, I immediately set it up and turned it on. What was I met with? A blank screen!!!!! I called Company "B" and told them about the problem. They told me to take the computer apart and check all connections. In my opinion, I should not have had to do this, for this machine was brand new. But, desperate for a working A4000, I followed the advice. After re-seating the Warp Engine, the machine started to work. When I booted up to start getting some work done, I noticed that the amount of RAM was somewhat smaller than it should have been. Calculated out, there was a total of 10 mb of RAM. But I ordered 14 mb of RAM. I called Company "B," and they told me that they would send out 4 mb.
When I received the RAM, I installed it on the Warp Engine. When I booted up again, the machine told me that something was wrong with my hard drive. I quickly turned the machine off. After waiting for some time, I turned the machine on again, and it went into an uncontrollable crash cycle. I could not stop this from happening, and so after disconnecting all cables to the machine, I removed the RAM. It was at this time that I noticed something odd about the SIMM that Company "B" sent me. It was 70ns speed, my setup required 60ns RAM. I called Company "B" and they told me to send the whole system back to them, a transaction that cost me $90!
After receiving the system, Company "B" did not seem to know what the problem was. They immediately sent out another A4000 with a Warp Engine at 40 Mhz and 14 mb of RAM. Since I had kept the hard drive from the previous machine, I had to take the case apart and re-install it in the new A4000. I also installed my hard earned EGS card. I bundled the machine up, turned it on and I was met with a blank screen. Obviously, this whole thing was getting very old, very fast. I took the machine apart again, removed the EGS card, and turned the machine on . It appeared to boot normally, and so I thought that the slot that I had the EGS card in might have been faulty. I tried a different slot, and the machine booted normally. Very pleased with this solution, I bundled the machine back up again, turned it on again, and was met with a blank screen again. I took the machine apart again, took out the EGS card again, and tried to boot again. This time, the screen stayed blank. I checked all the connections, and finally the computer booted. I put the EGS card in storage, and proceeded with using the A4000 to finish the already late review of Imagine 3.0 for this magazine. In the middle of a rendering, the machine crashed, and this time it was down for the count. I called Company "B" again, and they told me to send the machine back to them. They even said that they would pick up the shipping costs, which totaled over $100 this time, including the EGS card and hard drive. When they received the machine, I was told that it worked flawlessly. They installed the EGS card without any problems. Finally, after several days of testing and constant running of the machine, they performed a LightWave 3D rendering which took about three days to complete. They reported no problems whatsoever. They replaced the RAM and sent the machine back to me. When I received the machine, I plugged it in, and was met with a blank screen. I called Company "B" again, and they seemed quite perplexed at the whole situation, and they were not the only ones. They began to suspect that the Warp Engine may have been faulty.
At this time, I requested my money back. They didn't give me my money back, and they told me that they wanted to give me a working A4000. Their solution was to send me another A4000 without any processor module in it. I would then transfer the Warp Engine from the first machine to the one they sent me. When I received the second A4000, I installed the Warp Engine in it, and I was met with a blank screen. I told Company "B" about the situation, and they told me that they were out of Warp Engines, but were hard at work trying to get one out to me. About two weeks later, I called again. This time, they told me that the transaction was being handled directly through the distributor, and that the distributor would mail me a replacement Warp Engine when one became available. One week later, I called again. I was told that Company "B" was going to contact the distributor that same day, and that I would receive a call updating me on the situation. About four days later, I received my new Warp Engine. I installed it in the new A4000, and I was met with the same results. I then noticed that the Warp was not seated correctly on the pegs in the Amiga 4000 motherboard, and so I attempted to seat the module as securely on the pegs as I could. Finally, the machine worked! I decided to test this strategy on the other Amiga 4000 and Warp Engine, and it worked! In defense of Company "B," I do believe that the Warp Engine was being jarred loose in the shipping process. However, I still do not trust the first machine that they sent me due to its very erratic behavior, even when it was running correctly. I now have a working Amiga 4000 sitting on my desk, but with a slightly malfunctioning cooling fan.
So it comes down to one basic question: can we as Amiga users expect to get what we paid for? Of course we can! Just because we are users of the Amiga doesn't make us eligible for "Amiga Open Season." We deserve to be treated as any other consumer of a good or service is treated: with respect. If a company wrongs a customer, and this is going to happen, then that company should do everything within its power to right that wrong. As for my situation, I commend Company "B" for its work in getting me a working A4000. As for company "A," I refuse to even consider ordering from them ever again. In my opinion, they still owe me over $600 in computer repair fees.
